Saturday, March 26, 2011

People Can be So Entertaining

I am currently at a crossroads in my life. It is time to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my work world. One of the challenges of living alone is not having anyone to sound things off of. I often wonder if I am being kind of nutty when after a rough day, the only thought that rolls through my head is, "That's it." So after the rough days turn into weeks and months you just begin to wonder about what is next. I sent an e-mail to my tightest support circle with my thoughts and options. Some responded with positive comments but most remained silent. Yes, I know that I can be rather opinionated but I was actually asking for advice this time. So I put in the work to really looking for information that would help me make a decision about the next step. So now, I'm at the point where I'm pretty darn certain about what needs to happen for my personal health and happiness but as I move out in those concentric circles of support the response is very different. I think that if they could say 'You're wrong" they would. These are people who really have no idea what my daily experience is like and what I'm talking about. But yet they believe they know what the right path for me is. These are the same people that told me not to make that move to Texas after my divorce. Although the move to Texas was a short one, I wouldn't replace it for anything in the world. Those 5 months were filled with learning about myself - who I am, who I was, who I was becoming. They were priceless. They are what taught me where "home" is. So part of me is very entertained by these responses. I am reminded of how different I am from the masses. I am not afraid of personal challenges or the thought that I could be poor for a while. I might have made a pretty good Spartan all those centuries ago! I love change and am eager to see what might be coming around the next corner. Yes, it makes me a tad bit nervous, but I do not flinch from those butterflies in my stomach. I know that that is where my growth will come. I try hard not to react to their words of concern because I am that girl that has always taken the other side just to be contrary. So for today, I am still absorbing thoughts and advice from others as long as it feels positive and not judgmental. But I am also leaning pretty hard toward a new path and am eager to see where the journey takes me.

2 comments:

BrittBratt said...

Hey being poor is fun. It teaches you how to be creative with your food. I should know haha You're much stronger than I am. I've been known to let other peoples concerns sway my decision and then finding out that what I had wanted was actually what would have made me happy. So I say YAY for making that hard choice to make yourself happy. I look forward to more coffee dates!

Jen said...

I always say that our head can talk us in and out of anything, but our gut really knows what's right and wrong. Your gut knows what it's doing. Trust it.

Was that mature or what? :)