Wednesday Wandering Through the Gorge

 

 

There is such beauty in all things and it is easy for us to define it in bright colors alone.  The fall foliage here in Washington is something that I knew would astound me but the biggest surprise is that it happens every day - day after day after day.  I know that soon the fading will begin and that I will work to hold on to what is left, but for now, I am simply astonished.  I have put off driving the Columbia Gorge because I just didn't think I was ready to take in the devastation from this summer's fire.  But I didn't want to deny myself this gift of the Gorge in the fall for fear of hurting or being sad.  The leaves may be challenged to hold on through the storm that's coming so it could be now or never.  The rain had already begun so I knew I wouldn't see much beyond the colored leaves and I was fine with that.  So I headed down the Washington side of the Gorge and was not disappointed.  There were amazing sights but you won't see them here because there was just no place to pull over and take the pictures.  But I was surprised by the beauty I also found in the gray of the clouds.  With their movement it could reveal and hide the size and stature of the mountains behind them.  I was mesmerized by the beauty in what was hidden.  How many things in life do we only allow ourselves to see what is revealed or on the surface and forget about what may be buried and behind the clouds.  I also found some new hiking spots to put on my Adventure List.  I made a few stops along the way and noted where I wanted to return.  It was time to head over to the Oregon side.   The only thing better than the Washington side of the Gorge is the Oregon side.   I made a stop in Hood River and promised myself to come back when there was more time.  As I continued westward the signs of the fire came into view and the sadness overtook me.  The damage to entire cliffs were difficult to take in and the tears came.  But this too shall pass.  The moss will come this winter and through its depth and volume with help the rocks hold on until the undergrowth begins to rebuild the forest.  Time is all it needs.  In our rush to get through life, we often the forget the importance of long stretches of time.  All things come to those who wait.  

Where Am I Going?

Where does the time go?  This is a refrain from the aging and elderly.   But I am beginning to understand it.  There is a rhythm to my days but there is also freedom.  The weekends are as they have always been.  It is the time to spend with family who are entrenched in the work world schedule and the social calendar of the community.  Things happen on Saturdays and Sundays.  At times they can be exhausting because I have adjusted so quickly to this slower pace of life.  As the week begins, I tend to plot out a few things I want to do or goals I have for the week.  From there it just flows.  I really don't know what I may plan to do or accomplish in any given day.  But by the end of the week, the goals and plans are met and my agenda is once again clear.  And I am free to once again think and read and putter.  For the first time in my life I am not overthinking what I'm doing or where I am going.  I am just letting it be.  I know that God is guiding me through this part of the journey because I am not invested in any one particular thing.

As I let go, I feel myself being swept away from education.  Subbing is not teaching so I am able to look at the system with new eyes.  The more I see, the less I envision myself in the midst of it.  It is no longer feeding my spirit, it is just something to be done.  Conversely, as I get more connected to the land and waterways of this place, the more I feel drawn in.  I have no idea what I will be doing a month from now, a year from now or 5 years from now.  And I'm letting that be.  The world will claim me for what it needs.  It will take my gifts of teaching and use them in this new version of who I am becoming.