I am loving where I am in life and truly feel that this move to childcare was one of the smartest things that I have ever done. BUT, I am constantly struck by the things that I am doing and thinking and often catch myself reflecting on the oddness of them. For instance, just a year or so ago I was completely committed to buying locally. I only shopped for produce at farmers markets and would only buy within 50 miles of home. Today I will put my money on the table for bananas from absolutely anywhere. If you told me that they were from China and their transportation cost exceeded the cost of production, I would probably still buy them. Why? Because every child ever born will eat bananas. It is close to the perfect food for toddlers. And there are just days when I simply want a child to eat something and smile about it. I am also committed to cloth diapers for any number of reasons. I used them for my own kids and could go off on the number of reasons cloth are better than disposable. Today I caught myself changing a child's diaper and choosing disposable over cloth. I just wanted it to be quick and done. Yes, I have felt guilty about it all day but nonetheless, I made the choice and I take responsibility for it. I'm responsible for the fact that it went into my garbage, the landfill it will end up in and the fact that commitments are only as good as any given moment in the day. It is a good reminder to me about what young parents are going through every day of their lives. Yes, we know what is right for our planet and our future generations but sometimes we just get tired and want our babies to be happy and healthy and dry and comfortable. I suppose this is all a reminder of the steep learning curve for someone like me who is being reintroduced to babyland and that with every chink in the armor will come a reminder of the commitment. The next time I consider the disposable option I will recall the sadness that filled today. But I'm not sure about the banana issue. Could someone please come up with a banana that will grow in Silicon Valley?
Monday, August 29, 2011
Saturday, August 13, 2011
A Bunch of Random Thoughts About My New Job
I have completed the first real week of being a childcare provider and I am happy. That is the short answer to a very complicated question. People are so curious. Every one's question is the same; "How is it?" Some are asking about the specifics of my day, others want to know about the teaching end and still others want to know about whether it's possible to make a living at it. And of course some want to know all of the above. I have had many thoughts during this first week...
Every day is a new day. You start fresh each morning with no thought of what might happen. What lies ahead will slowly be revealed to you.
Each day stands on its own and is self-encapsulated. At the end, you pick up the toys and everything goes back in its box. Whatever has gone on is over. You go fix dinner, sit on the couch and smile at all the good that happened in these four walls today.
There is an ebb and flow to each day. The mornings start slowly and build into excitement. Nap time comes and we build again. The moments of frustration during the day are short lived and we move on to something new and better. Laughter returns and everyone smiles again.
The day revolves around food and sleep. Morning snack, morning nap, lunch, afternoon nap, afternoon snack. We are emptied and filled back up again and all is in balance once more.
Like in middle school, sometimes we just need to have a little cry. It is short-lived, followed with a hug and then we can go back to try try trying again. Trying to fit square blocks into square holes, trying to share, trying to figure out this crazy world.
I love my schedule. I am up at 6 but am still able to have my "summer time" leisurely cup of coffee. By 7 I am off to the shower and follow it up with a quick check for hen droppings in the play area. There is a slowness to beginning the day that I cherish. It fits where I am in life - taking it easy but still being the best that I can be, still teaching, still mattering to my students and their parents.
I really never sit down. I always said that about teaching but my legs can tell you that this is different. My quads are tightening from getting up and down off the floor, picking up toys and kids and cleaning up spills.
The morning thought of what I'm going to wear is the last thing on my mind. I never had much of a wardrobe but I always tried to fit in with my co-workers. Now I just put on a pair of capris and a shirt and get on with the day.
I love being home. It really never occurs to me that I haven't left the house all day until I actually do. When I get in my car, the first thought that comes to me is to wonder how long it's been since I have driven.
On a personal level, I am eating better than I have in a long time. There is only healthy food in the house and I am doing the cooking. The most decadent food around is oatmeal raisin cookies. In addition, the house is cleaner than ever. That is mostly what I do - clean; clean kids' faces or bums, clean the table, the counter, the floor. At the end of the day, I am physically tired and actually dirty. I love that. To look at me, I have done a full day's work but I am smiling, happy and satisfied. There is no thought of what will be, just contentment with what is.
How is it? It is great. I love my job. I am happy; happy with my kids, happy with my parents and happy with my working conditions. Everyday is new with no residual of what happened yesterday. There is no plan or even an inkling of an idea of where I am going. It is fine just to be here looking at the world through the eyes of a child. The word that comes to mind is discovery. While these kids are discovering the world around them, I am discovering who they are as people, the importance of smiles and laughter, the effect that playing has on learning and still more about who I am and am becoming.
Every day is a new day. You start fresh each morning with no thought of what might happen. What lies ahead will slowly be revealed to you.
Each day stands on its own and is self-encapsulated. At the end, you pick up the toys and everything goes back in its box. Whatever has gone on is over. You go fix dinner, sit on the couch and smile at all the good that happened in these four walls today.
There is an ebb and flow to each day. The mornings start slowly and build into excitement. Nap time comes and we build again. The moments of frustration during the day are short lived and we move on to something new and better. Laughter returns and everyone smiles again.
The day revolves around food and sleep. Morning snack, morning nap, lunch, afternoon nap, afternoon snack. We are emptied and filled back up again and all is in balance once more.
Like in middle school, sometimes we just need to have a little cry. It is short-lived, followed with a hug and then we can go back to try try trying again. Trying to fit square blocks into square holes, trying to share, trying to figure out this crazy world.
I love my schedule. I am up at 6 but am still able to have my "summer time" leisurely cup of coffee. By 7 I am off to the shower and follow it up with a quick check for hen droppings in the play area. There is a slowness to beginning the day that I cherish. It fits where I am in life - taking it easy but still being the best that I can be, still teaching, still mattering to my students and their parents.
I really never sit down. I always said that about teaching but my legs can tell you that this is different. My quads are tightening from getting up and down off the floor, picking up toys and kids and cleaning up spills.
The morning thought of what I'm going to wear is the last thing on my mind. I never had much of a wardrobe but I always tried to fit in with my co-workers. Now I just put on a pair of capris and a shirt and get on with the day.
I love being home. It really never occurs to me that I haven't left the house all day until I actually do. When I get in my car, the first thought that comes to me is to wonder how long it's been since I have driven.
On a personal level, I am eating better than I have in a long time. There is only healthy food in the house and I am doing the cooking. The most decadent food around is oatmeal raisin cookies. In addition, the house is cleaner than ever. That is mostly what I do - clean; clean kids' faces or bums, clean the table, the counter, the floor. At the end of the day, I am physically tired and actually dirty. I love that. To look at me, I have done a full day's work but I am smiling, happy and satisfied. There is no thought of what will be, just contentment with what is.
How is it? It is great. I love my job. I am happy; happy with my kids, happy with my parents and happy with my working conditions. Everyday is new with no residual of what happened yesterday. There is no plan or even an inkling of an idea of where I am going. It is fine just to be here looking at the world through the eyes of a child. The word that comes to mind is discovery. While these kids are discovering the world around them, I am discovering who they are as people, the importance of smiles and laughter, the effect that playing has on learning and still more about who I am and am becoming.
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