Before beginning the writing of this post, I thought it would be interesting to see how my feelings today compare with those of a year ago. As I searched the archives I sadly discovered there is no history. I didn't come back to my blog until mid November. Well, that says a lot about where I was last year at this moment.
So I will just start at the beginning. This is my second year of middle school and it feels so much better than my memories of 2008. I remember not sleeping for days and having horrible dreams of ill mannered juvenile delinquents who I had no idea of how to manage. In contrast, this year I have to admit that while I have lost some sleep over worries of starting a new year, there have been no weird dreams. I would just wake up and pre-play the first day. And before you know it, there was enough daylight that I could legitimately get up and make my coffee to start the day.
Day 1 finally arrived and I was as prepared as I wanted to be. I could have spend the whole weekend obsessing over tiny little details but knew that would not be healthy for me or anyone else in the classroom. I puttered around my room this morning until it was time for yard duty and went out to welcome a new crop. I was taken by surprise at how happy I was to see my now 7th grade students and my old friends from Sutter. It is that feeling of home that always brings my feet back to the ground. I constantly forget how important it is for me to be known.
What a difference a year makes! Last year I had so little knowledge of what I was doing. It was about all I could do to just to keep breathing. Fast forward to this year. I was totally shocked to see that deer in the headlights look from almost every student in my classroom until after lunch. Few of them made eye contact with anyone, let alone the teacher. Only the 3 Sutter kids who had me before even came close to laughing at my lighter comments. The poor things. The afternoon was a little better and I'm hopeful that after a good night's sleep these kids will remember Ms. Allen's words. Today is the worst of it. It's all downhill from here.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
A New Beginning
One of the things I love most about my job is that every fall brings a new beginning. It's like renegotiating your contract and saying "Yes! I want to do that again!" That's how I'm feeling today but more so. I have to contain myself not to shout out how excited I am about going back to school. It's not socially acceptable to be excited about the first day of school but in all honesty, that's who I am as a teacher.
Summer school is now a distant memory. My vacation to Washington was very nice. But I am all about being HOME and am deeply defined by my profession. It is time to begin anew once again.
Yesterday was my first day back which meant I was very distracted. There were people to say Hi to, summer school stuff that needed putting away, desks to move into position and a second classroom to prepare. I will be teaching a reading intervention class this year which needs its own room so special ed and ELL can also use the materials. I now lovingly call B-10 my annex. It was a long day but I was a little more focused by the time it was over.
Today when I returned I knew I had to get the paper up on the walls and start some lesson planning. Late this afternoon, I pulled out my "Beginning of the Year" folder and was overwhelmed with feelings of last year. I had no idea what I was doing but I had lists of talking points (which I believe came from my partner teacher) and getting to know you activities, most of which I never used. The past 2 days have been a huge AH HA of how little I knew just a year ago. I am overcome with how much calmer I feel going in to my second year of middle school. I know lots of people whom I had never even met at this time a year ago. Meeting new people is a huge challenge for me so the sense of familiarity makes me feel instantly at home. I know the writing curriculum and how I want to tweak it to make it better this year. But the biggest piece of the puzzle is the fact that I am once again teaching reading. I think it's much more emotional than academic. I am a reading teacher. It's where I started and to some extent defines who I am as a teacher. The things we read change what we think about the world and who we become. The deep conversations that go on in the classroom occur as a result of our shared reading experiences and what we think about them.
There's a tiny piece of me that just can't wait for Monday morning. But I also know that on Monday morning I will be nauseous and wishing the introductions and getting to know you stage was over and learning had already begun.
Summer school is now a distant memory. My vacation to Washington was very nice. But I am all about being HOME and am deeply defined by my profession. It is time to begin anew once again.
Yesterday was my first day back which meant I was very distracted. There were people to say Hi to, summer school stuff that needed putting away, desks to move into position and a second classroom to prepare. I will be teaching a reading intervention class this year which needs its own room so special ed and ELL can also use the materials. I now lovingly call B-10 my annex. It was a long day but I was a little more focused by the time it was over.
Today when I returned I knew I had to get the paper up on the walls and start some lesson planning. Late this afternoon, I pulled out my "Beginning of the Year" folder and was overwhelmed with feelings of last year. I had no idea what I was doing but I had lists of talking points (which I believe came from my partner teacher) and getting to know you activities, most of which I never used. The past 2 days have been a huge AH HA of how little I knew just a year ago. I am overcome with how much calmer I feel going in to my second year of middle school. I know lots of people whom I had never even met at this time a year ago. Meeting new people is a huge challenge for me so the sense of familiarity makes me feel instantly at home. I know the writing curriculum and how I want to tweak it to make it better this year. But the biggest piece of the puzzle is the fact that I am once again teaching reading. I think it's much more emotional than academic. I am a reading teacher. It's where I started and to some extent defines who I am as a teacher. The things we read change what we think about the world and who we become. The deep conversations that go on in the classroom occur as a result of our shared reading experiences and what we think about them.
There's a tiny piece of me that just can't wait for Monday morning. But I also know that on Monday morning I will be nauseous and wishing the introductions and getting to know you stage was over and learning had already begun.
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