Days with Mom and Dad

After only a couple months, we have fallen into a comfortable rhythm.  It is wonderful to be close enough to my parents just to be able get to them.  We've never had that before.  The 3,000 miles between us meant weeks of planning,  packing, and planning again - where and what to eat, what to do, where to go.  Time together was much more of an event than time together.  Now that I am within driving distance, we still plan our time together but it has this feeling of comfort and ease that has never been there before.  There are two versions.  When they come to see me, it means there is a project afoot.  It is a time for us to accomplish or create something together.  I get to see them at their strongest, their smartest, and their best selves.  But it is also the awareness of the remaining muscle and oxygen that is left in these two aging souls.  It is my honor to witness it and to step in when they need me or will let me.  I continue to learn ways to maintain my home without the experts from both of them in very different ways.  This version usually involves dirt and sweat so lunch is ham sandwiches, chips, and maybe cookies.  After clean up is happy hour and dinner out.  Version #2 is my favorite.  I drive down to see them.  If there is a project, it is usually packing it into my car.  But usually it is more, Hey, I want to show you this...  "This" could be a plan for an upcoming project, something on the computer or printer that has baffled them, or plants to be weeded or propagated.  It is slow and casual.  This day could be lunch at home or out but always ends with happy hour and dinner out.  The moments we have together I savor.  They are filled with stories, stories of work, stories of their youth or mine, and stories of struggle and achievement.  Some I have heard before but many are new.  But no matter which version, I listen.  I listen to remember.  I know the time we have together is limited and one day I will ache to hear their voices again, to see the fire in their eyes and I will want desperately to just once more, laugh together while we share a gin and tonic or just tonic for Mom.  I am blessed to have these days together.  I give thanks for the journey that brought me here to be in this place together.