Just Be Nice

This is a phrase that keeps echoing in my head.  It is something that I recently heard over and over again at a high school graduation party.  Parents were saying that when it comes down to it, all they really want is for their kids to be nice.  This is huge when I think about all the things that a parent may want for their 18 year old almost adult.  That is what all our parenting is about - just be nice.  It also popped up in a discussion with a friend about her aging mother.  Why can't she just be nice?  Now this is not something that just happened - she didn't get not nice because she was old.  But when you're trying to get good medical care for your mother, it might change things if the patient could be nice.

So what does it mean to be nice?  In my toddler world, it is don't hit, kick, pinch, bite or push.  But all good teachers know that you don't define anything in the negative.  Be nice is use your inside voice, treat everything and everyone gently.  To the parents of 18 years old it is to treat others with respect, and once again to use that inside voice and be gentle.  And to the aging parent it is to accept that others may know more than you do and to listen without judgment.  There is no need to say out loud every little thing that comes into your head and to realize that your life and well being are now in the hands of others.  So just be nice.

But what is it really?  It is to smile when someone makes eye contact with you.  We don't do enough of that anymore.  And when we do, we get it right back.  Smiles are one of the most contagious things around.  That's the thing about being nice; the effects are immediate.  And while you're at it, say hello.  Once again that doesn't happen enough anymore.  We have sort of lost the art of greeting one another when me meet and saying goodbye when we leave.  Part of being nice is also the art of politeness.  It is saying please and thank you and you're welcome.  It is also saying no thank you and excuse me. 

Being nice is being a positive force in the universe.  It is to look at life and each other in the best of terms.  Finding the beauty in the world instead of what is wrong is a perspective that sometimes takes practice.  But once accomplished, it is hard to go back.

Practice humility.  None of us is better than anyone else.  We have all been gifted in different ways.  Accept that everyone has their journey with highs and lows and that if we help each other along the way the path gets a little easier for everyone.  When we boast and brag or put ourselves above someone else it can only result in the other person feeling sad or less than equal.  Being nice lightens everyone's load and makes the world a better place.

Help each other.  When someone falls down, help them get up.  An ice pack or a band aid go a long way at my house.  If they are sick, give them a call or send a card and let them know that you are thinking of them.  When you accidentally bump them, apologize.  It's the little things in life that make all the difference.

Be nice.  It is what I am trying to teach my daycare kids.  It is what I try my hardest to model to everyone I meet.  It is still a struggle sometimes but if we all try a little harder the world will definitely be a nicer place for each and every one of us.