Peace From Quiet

Life has been at turbo speed lately. Lots of stuff going on at school, preparations for the trip to Florida for Grandpa's birthday and then coming back to clean up the messes in my absence both at home and at school. Today was one of those rare days where I had nothing scheduled and was able to call it my own. I did the stuff around the house that had to be done in the morning and then had the pleasure of thinking about what I wanted to do. I chose to read. What a gift to just have quiet in the house. I sometimes get so wrapped up in the noise of TV that I forget how nice it is to hear nothing but my own thoughts. This is something I am thinking of in making decisions about my future. I know that I am phasing out of my career as a classroom teacher and with that will come a huge hole in socialization. If I make the move to tutoring my only connections to the outside professional world will be my students and their parents. It is not a deal breaker, just something that will come with the territory. I am not one of those people that really needs a lot of contact but it is interesting to think about where I will fill that need, should it occur. One of the thoughts that popped into my head today was the myriad of feelings that occurred the year I was laid off from my job. I literally did not know who I was without a teaching job. It was how I defined myself and my entire life became a house of cards without it. I don't think that will happen this time simply because it is my choice this time around. But it is good to mull around all the pieces that go into my life before I cut one of them completely out. Another funny thing has popped up. It occurred to me that next year will be my 22nd year of teaching - the same exact number of years that I was married. That must mean something. 22 is clearly my line of demarcation! It makes me wonder what will be next. Home ownership perhaps? Or maybe I'll just be doing my next career for another 22 years. I just love what pops us when the mind isn't full of other things.