Negativity

While I can be whiney from time to time I'm really not a negative person. As a result I've been pretty astounded by the negative energy in and around our faculty room this week. It started off between a couple teachers and it just seemed to spread. One thing led to another and at the end it seemed we were working with middle school adults. Who else makes the loser sign on their forehead, rolls their eyes and shares it with their best friend while in the midst of their co-workers. I don't really understand the mean spiritedness of it. It's kind of like me trying to grasp the idea of going to war. I don't get it? How can you be do things like that just because you don't "like" another person? We're all grown up and yet there is this childishness that abounds. So today was the day for apologies and bringing flowers to those who were hurt. I truly do admire the courage it took to follow through on those actions. But now the guilty party is totally embarrassed and depressed about her behavior and has removed herself from the faculty room. So we have traded disrespect for isolation. Both of them seem equally painful to me. While I know intimately about the need to remove yourself from people around you to sort through the actions of your life, (after all I'm the one that ran away to Texas) I'm uncomfortable with my inability to bring everyone back together again. Sutter is a close staff. We are a small group of people so anyone's absence is noticeable. There is a hole that can't be filled without everyone's presence there. We define ourselves by who we are as a group not as individuals. As a result I have written an e-mail to the staff hoping to create a change. I am hopeful that it will lead to some deeper thinking and that those who want us to be the best we can be will respond and begin the conversation. So here is the letter:

It is an understatement to say that this has been a rough week. Feelings have been hurt. Apologies have been made. And now we are at that awkward stage of wanting to forgive and move on.

Sutter is an amazing place. We are a staff that is social as well as professional. It is clear that we enjoy each other’s company. People notice it the minute they walk in the door. Stand outside the faculty room and what you will usually hear is the sharing of funny family stories followed by loud belts of laughter. Watch us as we return to class and you will see the last remnants of smiles on our faces before we lead our classes in the joys of the –at word family, finding the least common denominator, or discussing the causes of the Revolutionary War. We are a dedicated staff. We love our jobs and each other. We cannot have one without the other. As educators, we are involved in the most difficult of professions and need each other’s support each and every day.

We have created many close friendships and have supported one another through some difficult times. But like any other family we have our strengths and weaknesses, our funny little quirks and we try hard to love each other despite it all. It is time to open the door a little wider to be sure that everyone is included in this family called Sutter. Each and every one of us must be respected, supported and valued as an integral member of the family. Yes, it has been a rough week. But hopefully amidst the hurt and forgiveness we have learned some new things about one another and ourselves. Hopefully our Sutter family ties have grown stronger with a deeper respect for one another. It is time for us all to forgive and begin to move on.